Life By The Seat Of My Pants

Archive for June 2011

I shared my first blog post on my website today. The site doesn’t *officially* open until July 1, 2011, but you can check it out now ūüôā It is still a work in progress, so new content is being added often.

I struggle with inner demons on a daily basis. I am a self-proclaimed perfectionist and I am also my biggest critic. I am a great cheerleader for other people, but not  for myself and I am really feeling the sting of my inner critic today.

I am getting into the thick of creating the upcoming E-couse (which still has no name, by the way) and I am stuck. I am trying to work out the details of what goes where and coordinate the art prompts with actual information. I have so many things that I feel should be *first* that it is hard to break them apart for other weeks. I also keep thinking I don’t “know enough” to fill all of¬†the weeks with information.

I am struggling with self doubt BIG time right now and my inner voice is almost paralyzing. As a matter of fact, I am sitting here browsing Facebook and writing a blog post instead of working. I keep thinking I am in waaaaaaay over my head.

Who am *I* to TEACH these things??? I have struggled with my weight my entire life and even though I am now¬†a personal trainer I STILL have to work HARD every day¬†for every single pound. It doesn’t seem fair. Who would listen to me?!

Somewhere (so deep that I can barely hear it today) is a voice that says those are the very reasons I can help other women. I know that those women feel the exact same struggles and frustrations and can relate. In that same deep spot I also believe without a doubt that I *DO* know what I am talking about and that I *HAVE* changed my life, even though in this moment I feel like I am at square one again.

*takes a deep breath and listens *closely* to that knowledgable voice with-in*

AFFIRMATIONS for the day…

I am determined to prove my inner critic wrong.

I am confident in my knowledge and abilities.

I have changed my life and I know I can help other women do the same.

I will NEVER go back!

Posted on: June 13, 2011

Last night I was working on a journal page for the new <a href="Click here to visit Wild Precious Studios.“>Elements of Art Journaling with Effy Wild. The course doesn’t even officially startuntil July 1, 2011, but she is alsready releasing BONUS content and I am LOVEING it! This weeks bonus video¬†(which you can see for FREE on youtube) uses the four elements earth, air, water and fire.

From the moment I started watching the video I felt something stir inside me. I adore the way Effy’s page turned out! I liked it so much, in fact, that I decided to recreate it *exactly* as she had instead of my own interpretation. BIG mistake.

I played the video and paused it after the first step. I followed those steps *exactly* in my art journal then realized I didn’t want to have my Elements pages in that journal. I want to have all of my elements pages in a seperate *new* journal. So, I swirled the paint around a bit and moved to the new journal.

I started again, following Effy’s steps exactly (only making one exception of rearranging the order of colors slightly) and got as far as step four before I realized I was HATING the page. ¬†Something just felt “off” about it, plus it was very sloppy looking. So, I stamped a few images over the top and started yet again!

This time, I knew I had to make a few more changes. Effy uses the magical triangular symbols for each element on her page and those symbols mean nothing to me (even though I am Pagan.) When I work with the elements I use the words. I like to see the actual words. Once I began to see the WORDS on my page, I found myself chanting them as I was writing them and feeling MUCH more connected to the page. I also adjusted the arrangement of the writing and stamped words, plus I stamped images into the palms instead of making mandalas.

I cannot even express how much I LOVE this page. ¬†I love my interpretation even more than the¬†original, which I thought was FABULOUS! ¬†ūüôā ¬† I am so glad I was brave enough to keep starting over until it felt right. ¬†I think that’s the point of Effy’s Elements course. It’s not about doing what she does, the way SHE does it. It’s about taking the elements and interpreting them in a way that speaks to YOU.

If I am getting this much out of the FREE bonus pre-class party, I can only imagine how deep we are going to get once the course is in full swing ūüôā

The past two weeks have been extremely busy for me but I can’t complain. First of all, my household goods were finally delivered, so I spent an entire week unpacking and putting my house back together. It is so¬†comforting¬†to be using my OWN things in my OWN house again. It feels so good to sleep in MY bed with MY pillows every night. I love being able to cook with my OWN dishes and wash laundry in my OWN washer ūüôā

My brain has also been on overdrive and I have been taking FULL advantage of it. I have been brainstorming for my new online business as well as for an E-course I plan to release in September. The course will focus on weight loss and use art as a way to work through all of the issues that may come to the surface during the process. I have a notebook full of ideas and I keep adding more everyday. I have the basic skeleton set up on my Ning site and I also created a Facebook ¬†page to go along with it. You can go “like” ¬†my Facebook page here¬†and I will be launching the new website Whole Heart Fitness on July 1, 2011 ¬†ūüėÄ

I have also been creating LOTS of art! Effy Wild released a BONUS LESSON for her <a href="Click here to visit Wild Precious Studios.” target=”_blank”>Elements of Art Journaling E-course that opens July 1, 2011. I have been making new backgrounds using that lesson and I’m really LOVE-ing arting with Effy ūüėÄ

I have also been working through Tee Thompson’s Rustic Journals¬†course and I LOVE how my first journal turned out! It is soooooo grungy and cool ¬†ūüėÄ

 

Tomorrow I will be having a “Thank You” cook out for all of the people who have helped me since my return to the States. The people who loaned me furniture, housewares, helped in my yard or anything else to I may have needed in the past two months. I am so thankful for their help and I wanted to let them know how much I appreciate them.

*whew*

I THINK that’s all for now. It’s time for me to get back to work ūüôā

Until next time…

Big hugs!!!!